Kickass KPD commandments

Kickass, the doorstop dog, may have created a monster in agreeing to help his keeper establish the Kickass Presidential Denier (KPD) foundation.  The keeper seems possessed and obviously needs to get out of the house and mingle with people.  He keeps changing the KPD motto—“PRESIDENTIAL DENIAL MAKES AMERICA GRACIOUS AGAIN,” and instead of bylaws, the keeper has written commandments.   Kickass throws up his paws in abject frustration.

KICKASS PRESIDENTIAL DENIERS (KPD) Ten Commandments.

  1. Thou shalt have no leaders that “have brought thee out of the land of” decency and into the land of childish absurdity.
  2. Thou shalt not bow down to anyone who is “a jealous god” or a jerk.
  3. Thou shalt not swear , except in political discourse.
  4. Remember the Sabbath as the day to watch football and forget politics
  5. Honor thy father and mother, even if they voted for the narcissistic groper.
  6. Thou shalt not kill.  (You may think about it, but don’t do it.)
  7. Thou shalt not commit adultery. (Do not even think about this one, except as it describes the orange-haired one’s past behavior.)
  8. Thou shalt not steal, not even used towels from gaudy Trump hotels.
  9.   Thou shalt not bear false witness, unless you live near the ridiculer-of- the- handicapped in his neighborhood of the mendacious whooper where you can say anything and never be held accountable.
  10.   “Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s house, thy neighbor’s wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor anything that is thy neighbor’s.”   (This one stands with KPD exactly as it was lifted from the Bible, with the caveat that “thy neighbor’s” ox and ass are different things to different people, especially “thy” ass.)

(See previous posts for the KPD middle finger handshake and sign of member recognition.)

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