Kickass, the doorstop dog, says a big part of the problem is that Trump does not have a dog. Putin tried to give him a Russian Wolf Hound, but it confused the President because it looked so much like Kellyanne Conway. The Koch brothers offered him a bloodhound but it was dumped when it tracked bad money back to Trump. The NRA offered him a pointer but it kept pointing quail in Trump’s hair, and it was banished to a backroom where there was a lap-dog named Sean Spicer. This lap-dog had been trying its best to be the Presidential dog by face-licking and rolling over and heeling, but it developed bladder problems from straining and stretching to mark another dog’s narcissistic territory.
Kickass volunteered to be the Presidential dog, but was told by Steve Bannon that there was no need for a door-stop dog since everything in the Trump White House goes on behind closed doors.
Kickass thinks maybe rather than a dog, the Trump gang needs a lyon.