Kickass, the doorstop dog, says his keeper considers the NFL a cultural mafia that has hijacked the judgment of the masses so they cough up huge amounts of money to sit on their collective asses and watch behemoth young men smash their brains.
Yesterday the keeper drove past an athletic field where little boys about the size of fire hydrants were all decked out in football uniforms and black helmets, and were obviously being taught the fundamentals of football by a cadre of adults. It was unquestionably NFL pre-school.
The keeper wanted to stop and shout to the adults, “What the hell are you and the NFL doing to these sweet little boys and their sweet little brains? Let them go to the swings and slides, and you need to get a life out of the NFL’s greedy reach!”