Kickass, the doorstop dog, would like to talk briefly to some of the 100 or so people who will die today of gunfire: Some of you see it as a way out of something you no longer want to be a part of and are pulling the trigger yourself. It’s your call, but we would like to have talked it over with you. Maybe we could have helped. But there was that gun, such a handy solution as you saw it.
You young gang bangers who think you are so invincible and need to demonstrate just how goddamn tough and masculine you are. Grab that gun and prove it, and then get ready for the worms to eat your rotting corpse. You could have had a life—a good one, but there was that handy gun. You accident victims—some almost babies and others as skilled as soldiers. What a fun gun it seemed to be! You murder victims whose last sight was the barrel of that handy-dandy gun.
Goodbye to all of you. We’re not proud of you, but we’re not doing a goddamn meaningful thing to prevent there being another 100 of you tomorrow. That’s just the way we are—absolutely as gun dumb as the corpse-eating worms.